Vulnerability isn't the sign of weakness you may think it is.
Following the pandemic and the great resignation, Australian organisations were then hit with quiet quitting, where people gave up those tasks which were not part of the role and for which they were not technically being paid.
According to the Gallup State of the Global Workforce survey in 2023 employee engagement levels in Australia are about 20%...that means 80% of the Australian workforce goes home at the end of every single day believing the organisation they work for doesn’t listen to them or care about them.
Now, more than ever, your leadership skills matter.
Marcus Buckingham at the Gallup organisation in 2006 identified that people will join an organisation, but they leave their manager. He also identified the single most important factor that contributed to job satisfaction and employee engagement is the relationship an employee has with their direct manager. This means it’s critical to have good leadership skills and good leadership skills are authentic. So why not try one thing that will help to improve your abilities as an authentic leader?
Be vulnerable.
In her book, Daring Greatly, Brené Brown describes vulnerability as "uncertainty, risk, and emotional exposure." It's that unstable feeling we get when we step out of our comfort zone or do something that forces us to loosen control.
Being vulnerable can feel tremendously uncomfortable but the fact is, vulnerability is good for us. For too long the notion of a vulnerable leader was seen as the sign of a weak leader but this is a myth – vulnerability actually takes courage.
If you want to get more comfortable with being vulnerable try doing some of the following:
Recognise that facing vulnerability takes enormous courage. Take small steps (like asking someone what they are thinking) and be proud of your bravery when you do.
Let go of the constant worry about what other people think of you. Most people are focused on their own internal struggles, not you.
Feeling overwhelmed? Focus your attention gently on your breath and the sensations in your body for a few moments before returning your attention back to the task at hand.
Don't worry about being perfect – in fact, don't even consider it. No one is perfect, and the more you hold yourself to an impossible ideal, the more easily you will give up.
Perhaps most importantly, make sure you try the difficult things. You can’t expect your team to try new or difficult tasks if you won’t attempt them yourself. This takes courage, but courage is part of vulnerability. Think of that wonderful Eleanor Roosevelt quote - “You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, 'I have lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.' You must do the thing you think you cannot do.”
Showing vulnerability as a leader doesn’t mean bleeding hearts or dramatic outpours of emotion, it means being honest with your team about your challenges.
This could take the form of saying things like:
You know, I’m struggling to get this right and I could really use your help.
I don’t think I’m the best person to answer that question, others have more experience than I do with that. What if you check with….
I haven’t done this before and I admit I’m nervous about it, but I’m going to try it. If it works, that’s great, if it doesn’t we’ll have the discussion and see what we can do better.
To assess your current perception of your vulnerability, ask yourself the following questions:
On a scale of 1-10 where 1 is woefully inadequate and 10 is a superstar, how would you rate your comfort with showing vulnerability?
What do you need to do to increase that score by at least 2 points? (Such as ‘seek the perspective of someone I don’t usually reach out to’ or ‘prepare specific dot points for some feedback I might need to give someone’.)
How will I know I have improved in that area? What will I be doing differently?
Finally, once you have assesed your perception of your own vulnerability, start creating a plan for improving your skill in this much needed area of leadership. Ultimately, you'll be glad you did.
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